


What do I do when you aren’t right beside me

by HeyAdora1234



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Angst and Tragedy, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Compliant, Established Relationship, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Medium Length, Memory Loss, Multiple Perspectives, POV Third Person Limited, Post Season 5, Romantic Fluff, bro i feel so bad for catra dude, double trouble gets some of their own drama to deal with, god im so bad at tags, melog is there too, these two have already gone through so much trauma why not add more
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-19
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:33:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 19,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25386124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeyAdora1234/pseuds/HeyAdora1234
Summary: Catra had hoped this day would never come, she never thought it would, but yet there she was, Adora, lying on the bed Entrapta and some assistants had set up.orIt’s a medium length fic about Adora being in a coma (and then later some other stuff happens to her), and the struggles everyone else (but mainly Catra.) goes through without her. Lots of bittersweet flashbacks, and a sad ending. Haha JK... unless.My first time writing a fan fiction, and I was inspired by the depth and beauty of these characters in a kids show. Thanks!
Relationships: Adora & Bow & Catra & Glimmer (She-Ra), Adora/Catra (She-Ra), Bow/Glimmer (She-Ra)
Comments: 25
Kudos: 158





	1. Catra

Catra will always remember that day, the day when everything came crashing down.

It was a day not too unlike any other, same morning routines, same afternoon nap, same time spent with Melog. The only thing noticeably absent in her day was Adora, an absence that she recognized with every step she took. It was the afternoon, and she was spending a couple of hours at Mystacor, and trying to relax for once in her life. She was going to be joined by Adora in the evening and they would’ve spent the rest of the day together, talking about how weird Spas were, and catching up after much too long spent apart. 

Adora was on a trip on the planet Ulara fighting Horde Remnant forces. It was supposed to be a routine mission. But it wasn’t.

Catra sat on the floor petting Melog, yawning, and watched as Adora packed up her stuff for the trip. She didn’t have much to bring because she didn’t really own that many things. She brought the same outfit she’d worn almost her entire life, some plain white pajamas for the ride over, a toothbrush and some snacks. (Darla never did provide the best on-flight refreshments.)

Catra didn’t want Adora to go, she never did, but she knew that arguing with Adora was kind of pointless. She knew that Adora would always try and help people if they needed it, that’s just who she was. Catra would’ve come with, but she was recovering from a cold, and according to Entrapta, “You really shouldn’t bring Etherian diseases to other planets! Our planet was isolated for sooo long and the immune systems of residents of planets like Ulara probably couldn’t handle them, it would be disastrous!” Catra never understood why Entrapta was so enthusiastic about everything, even when talking about diseases and disaster. Nevertheless, she knew Entrapta was right, as she was almost always right.

And so she was told by Glimmer and Bow, who were going with Adora, to get some rest and maybe even take a spa day when she felt better. Adora laughed. “I’d like to see that.” She smiled her gorgeous dorky smile.   
“Maybe I will take a spa day.” Catra said. “And you’ll meet me there Adora, once you get back.”  
“Are you asking me or telling me?”  
“Telling you.”  
Adora smiled “Works for me, it’s a date.”  
Catra’s heart fluttered at the words “it’s a date.” She still couldn’t believe after 2 years that Adora was actually her girlfriend. What did she do to deserve her, she wondered as she looked into Adora’s kind eyes. She then grabbed Adora’s hand and pulled her in for a kiss goodbye. Bow and Glimmer smiled at Adora’s tomato red face. 

They all said goodbye to each other and when Adora walked up the ramp into Darla, Catra said “Hey, Adora?”  
“Yeah?”  
“Just try to stay in one piece.”  
“Aww, are you worried about me?” Adora said teasingly.  
“Maybe... but don’t let that go to your head you idiot” Catra said.   
Adora just smiled back.

Knowing what would happen in the long weeks to come, Catra wished she could’ve made small moments like that last forever.


	2. Catra

Catra missed Adora so much that day, an ever present ache was noticeable in her heart. She supposed it was kind of selfish to want Adora all to herself, but she didn’t care. She wandered around Bright Moon with Melog looking for something to do. Even after 2 years of living in Bright Moon, she didn’t ever think she’d get used to the bright, vibrant colors, the round organic shapes and the soft pillows, beds and couches in every room that so vehemently contrasted with the sharp, rough and dark nature of her childhood home.

She remembered her first days in Bright Moon, oftentimes questioning her too good to be true reality. Adora kept Catra company, and distracted her from her own thoughts with corny jokes, kept her busy so she didn’t focus on her crushing guilt. They talked about a lot of things, from silly topics to heavy ones, and spent a lot of time reminiscing. They had missed years of each other’s life, years that they couldn’t just simply make up with a few hours of conversation. And yet, Catra found it helped, it helped her deal with the enormity of emotions she was dealing with. It helped to take things slow, moment by moment, one thing at a time. She didn’t have to worry about a war now, or Shadow Weaver, or anything else. She was there with Adora, living a life she never thought she would have. It didn’t matter to Catra what they were talking about, because she was with Adora. The rest of the world could’ve faded away for all she cared.

Adora organized game nights with Catra, helping her to get to know everyone Adora had spent the past years with. Catra found herself seeing what Adora saw in them, a large family of beautifully different people. She just hoped one day she could join that family, but with the damage she’d done to their lives she doubted she could. She grew to be somewhat fond of Glimmer and Bow, found out how deeply caring they were when they weren’t on the other side of a war. She spent many nights on the rug in Adora’s room, as the breeze made the curtains sway back and forth, easily beating all of her friends at whatever game they had picked that night.

It felt strange for Catra to use the word friends. Sure she technically had friends in the Horde, Adora being her best, but she never really thought of them as friends. Friends were not allowed in the Horde. No, friends weren’t only not allowed, they were actively discouraged. Shadow Weaver and other Horde leaders always pounded out any kind of compassion between soldiers, always ingrained in their heads that kindness was equal to weakness. Catra and Adora always knew differently though, they were much better off because of each other, better off because of the love that had bloomed in the harshest of conditions, and had slipped through the cracks of the Horde’s control.

She was aimlessly walking around the halls of Bright Moon with Melog, lost in memories when she decided to go to Mystacor for their planned date. She had a hard time ignoring the memories of the place looming in her mind. Of all the threats she had faced in her life, physical and mental, the risk of losing Adora, just after finally starting to get her back proved to be too much for Catra to handle. She barely slept in the nights before the heart, and went outside to be among the stars often. The stars had a way of consoling Catra when nothing else would, when Catra wouldn’t let anyone else console her. The curious little glowing orbs strung in patterns across the sky fascinated Catra, and listened to her thoughts patiently. She cried every night, thinking that she was going to be alone again, because that’s all she thought she would ever be, alone. It didn’t matter if Adora was far away in a foreign kingdom, or right next to her, in the end, Catra thought she would always be alone. She knew it was the truth, but it was so hard for her to accept. She had to hope that no one, especially Shadow Weaver, would see how large of a chink there was in Catra’s armor.

It was early in the evening. when she received word from a messenger. She doesn’t remember much from that evening, but she remembers the messenger. That’s when it all started. The messenger gave her a piece of paper folded in two, and looked at her in a strange way. She will never forget the words on that message. 

Come to Bright Moon. Adora is hurt.

Her heart stopped. The next hours were a blur. She vaguely remembers getting to Bright Moon as fast as possible, but she doesn’t remember if she rode Melog or if she just sprinted to Bright Moon. Either way it took her way too long to get there.

She vaguely remembers charging into Bright Moon castle, the usually stony faced guards just giving her a pitiful look. She does remember the moment she saw Adora, and when she felt like the air was sucked out of her lungs.

Catra had hoped this day would never come, she never thought it would, but yet there she was, Adora, lying on the bed Entrapta and some assistants had set up.

Catra cried, and couldn’t stop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, hope you enjoy this chapter, just FYI I’ll probably post chapters here erratically, maybe 3 chapters in one day but the farthest chapters will ever be apart is a week. I don’t really know how long this fanfic will be, it could end up being really short, I’m just gonna go with the flow. Thanks for reading!


	3. Glimmer

Glimmer couldn’t believe it. After all the things they had been through, a routine scouting mission might be the thing to... she didn’t want to say it.

She kept telling herself on that far too long trip of a couple hours back to Etheria, to her kingdom of Bright Moon, that they’d been through far worse things together and Adora would be just fine. Yet something about the way Adora, the woman who could turn into an 8-foot tall almost indestructible warrior looked so small, weak and frail, told Glimmer she should be worried. When she searched Bow’s eyes she could see he was thinking the same things. He looked scared, scared as she’d ever seen him. They sat next to Adora’s bed together holding hands, trying to comfort each other.

She didn’t want to think back on her fresh and painful memories of what had happened, but she searched them nevertheless, for the chance that something she saw could help Adora. She replayed the events in her head.

It was a mission to the planet Ulara, not very far from Etheria at all, that’s why they decided to use Darla and not use the Horde’s teleporting technology that Entrapta had repurposed for them. They all loved going on Best Friend Squad road trips, even Catra (they all know that she only pretended to hate them.) Oh stars, Glimmer hadn’t even thought about Catra yet. Glimmer could only imagine how much pain Catra will go through seeing Adora this badly hurt. She knows as much as anyone who’s ever seen Catra and Adora together how Adora is like the sun to Catra. Glimmer knows at that moment that however hard it is for her and Bow to see Adora like this, it’s going to be so much harder for Catra. Bow nods, as if he can read her mind.

She reminds herself to get back to her mission of searching her memories. She brings herself back to Ulara in her mind. They were doing their usual scouting routines, Bow using whatever thingamabob he and Entrapta had created most recently to scan the Horde remnant fortress. She still couldn’t believe the Horde has lasted this long without Horde Prime in charge. She had heard the rumors, a smart and ambitious shapeshifter, like her friend Double Trouble, had seen a power vacuum and grabbed it. They say she impersonated Horde Prime, and pretty much bluffed her way into controlling what was left of the Horde.

“Focus Glimmer” she reminded herself. She recalled the moment they were ambushed. Adora and Bow were laughing at Glimmer because she was using her binoculars the wrong way around. Glimmer ended up laughing about it too, at least until everything went wrong. She heard Bow yell and Adora say “For the Honor of Grayskull” before she even saw the first Horde Soldier.

She doesn’t really remember every detail of their fight, she doesn’t usually, but she remembers when she saw that old woman who had fallen down. Glimmer wondered why she was in the middle of a forest, but didn’t have time to think about it. She was busy fighting 6 Horde Soldiers and couldn’t protect her so she got Adora’s attention. Glimmer plays the next painful moments from her memories in slow motion. Adora rushed over to help the woman and jumped in front of her to protect her from the blast she was about to receive from a Horde Soldier. “Weird.” Glimmer thought. No matter how horrible they are, the Horde doesn’t usually target civilians. Glimmer thought about the blast. She doesn’t remember it being unusual. She keeps thinking and trying to remember, and she realized that the blast was red, different from normal Horde weapons which produce green energy. She wasn’t sure if this meant anything, but she kept the information tucked away anyway.

She remembers seeing something change on Adora’s sword but she doesn’t remember what. She remembers Adora immediately losing She-Ra and falling to the forest floor. Glimmer could tell something was seriously, horribly wrong, and she screamed Bow’s name and transported them both, and the old woman out of there.

They took the old woman to the nearest village, and right as she was transporting her, Bow and Adora away, she thought she saw the old woman’s eyes change.

They rushed onto Darla because Adora was growing paler and sweatier by the second. They gave her the medicinal herbs that Madame Razz decided to put in Darla’s storage one day without explanation, and laid her down on her bed in her and Catra’s room aboard Darla.

Her memories having caught up with the present, she decided to go check how close they were to Etheria.

She saw her home planet in the distance through Darla’s window, growing larger by the second, and said softly  
“Just hang on Adora.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I originally planned on writing this story only from Catra’s perspective, but I decided it was a good idea to see Glimmers perspective too, and add a little more variety.


	4. Glimmer

Glimmer had of course notified Bright Moon of her impending arrival, and so all of Adora’s friends who were close enough were there as soon as Bow and Glimmer walked out of Darla carrying Adora.

Sea Hawk and Mermista were on a trip down the river for their honeymoon that passed through Bright Moon, so they came right away. Perfuma’s kingdom was the closest out of all the Princess’s so she was able to make it to Bright Moon when they arrived. Of course Spinnerella and Netossa were there, waiting with everyone else. Entrapta was there, she spent most of her time in Bright Moon, and always did maintenance on Darla after trips. And her dad was there, he had set up a stretcher for Adora. Everyone ran Adora to the medical room. It broke Glimmer’s heart to see the look on all of their faces when they saw Adora’s limp, weak body, even Mermista’s usual look of complete and utter apathy was nowhere to be found. Glimmer saw some tears in her eyes. No one had ever seen Adora this weak, no one but Catra in the Heart of Etheria.

“Catra” Glimmer reminded herself. She looked up at her dad and asked if she had been notified, and Micah said  
“Yes, we passed your words on to Mystacor.”  
She sighed. “Thanks Dad“  
Micah pulled his daughter into a giant, comforting hug that he was so good at, and Glimmer relaxed, though just a little.  
“Glimmer” he said, “I’m here for you.”  
Glimmer only gave him a weak smile, and after pulling away he said, “I’ll leave you guys alone for now.” Glimmer went back to Adora’s side, where Bow was standing and explaining what happened to the doctors and Entrapta, who had her usual curiosity about everything.

It was only a couple minutes until she heard heavy loud running footsteps. Catra shoved the double doors open and ran to Adora’s side. Mermista, Seahawk, Perfuma, Netossa and Spinerella decided to give Catra some privacy, and left the room. Catra took Adora’s hand, and stared at her with a look of utter and complete shock.  
“Adora?” She asked, almost whispering.

For a moment everyone and everything was silent, until Glimmer heard a sob come from Catra. The sob started out so quietly that Glimmer wondered if she had even heard it. But it got louder, and louder, and louder, until it had become a screaming cry. Glimmer and Bow moved over immediately to comfort her, and so did Entrapta.  
“Hey, we’re here for you Catra.” Glimmer said. Bow nodded his head in agreement.  
Although she knew Catra would be torn apart, she was still absolutely shocked by the grand display of emotion. In front of not only some of her closest friends, but also a team of Bright Moon doctors who were complete strangers to Catra. This is by far the most vulnerable and raw Glimmer had ever seen her be, in public or in private, and it seemed like Catra could care less.

Adora had explained to Glimmer how the repeated abuse dealt by Shadow Weaver and other members of the Horde to Catra had led to her building up unscalable walls to protect her from showing her feelings, or as they were taught in the Horde, to protect her from showing any weakness her enemies could exploit.

But Glimmer also knew how Adora always was able to tear Catra’s walls down. She knew from the way Catra talked about Adora with Glimmer in Horde Prime’s ship. That was the first time Glimmer could really tell Catra wasn’t a feelingless, cold Horde Soldier. In those moments, Glimmer could see the person that Adora loved shine through, and she could start to see why Adora always slept with her knees tucked, as if hoping one morning she’d wake up and Catra would be curled up by her feet. She knew because of the way Catra looked at Adora (sometimes Glimmer would catch Catra just staring at Adora and she had to elbow her and remind her it was her turn to roll the dice in their favorite board game.) She knew how special Adora was to Catra.

So they all sat there together, comforting Catra until she ran out of tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey again! Thanks for reading, it means a lot to me.


	5. Adora

Adora woke up to a dream.

She didn’t remember, she was trying so hard to remember. She had to remember...

She saw a young, frail, blonde woman, lying on a bed. She didn’t look to have any injuries, there was no blood, no bruises, but Adora could tell that this girl was severely injured. She looked to be still alive, sleeping, but in pain.

She saw a large group of people huddled around the bed, all of them looking shattered seeing this young woman like this. Adora could tell they all cared about her a lot.

Everything about the scene carried a vague sense of familiarity, like a dream she could barely remember. The room was large, bright and colorful, a stark contrast to the faces of fear, pain and loss in the room. She didn’t understand what was going on here, who that woman was, when she saw a young woman rush in to the room, sit down and tenderly take the hand of the sleeping girl.  
“Adora?” The girl whispered, carrying indescribable pain with the word.  
Adora looked at this girl’s face, and she remembered. She knew that face, she could never forget that face.

Catra brought it all rushing back to Adora. The mission, the trip over, the ambush, and the attack. She realized the young, weak woman she was looking at was herself. She connected the dots in her mind, and looked down at the scene she could now place. She was in Bright Moon’s Medical Room, and there were several doctors, Entrapta, Glimmer, Bow and Catra all huddled around her. She was lost in her own thoughts, asking herself dozens of questions she couldn’t answer, when she heard sobbing. It was Catra, putting her emotions on full display for everyone to see. Adora was at first surprised, but immediately turned to feeling a heavy hearted sadness. Adora wanted to reach out, sweep her up in her arms and hold her forever, like she used to do when Catra was in pain in the Horde. Adora loved Catra more than anything in this world and the next, and couldn’t bear to see her like this, she just wanted Catra to be happy, eternally, especially after all the pain she’d been put through, by Shadow Weaver, Hordak, Horde Prime, and her. Catra didn’t deserve this.

Adora hadn’t seen Catra, strong, fearless Catra, this weak and helpless since she had been in Horde Prime’s ship, just waking up from being controlled by Horde Prime. Soon Adora was crying just as much as Catra was, understanding the pain she was going through. She remembers seeing Catra for the first time under Horde Prime’s control. It was like she had lost a part of her. She remembers how hard it was to look Catra in her eyes, because those weren’t the eyes she knew, those weren’t Catra’s intelligent, piercing eyes, those were some despicable green glowing mutation of the eyes she knew, the eyes she could lose herself in. She remembers feeling hopelessness, utter hopelessness, but it soon melted into a barely controlled rage burning inside her like nothing before. She was pure fury, and she would make Horde Prime pay, whatever it took. Horde Prime took away her Catra from Adora, and he would pay. As Glimmer and Bow reached out to comfort Catra, Adora found a small amount of solace in the fact that Catra would and always will have Bow and Glimmer, and all the other princesses around to lean on when she needed strength. But that wouldn’t, couldn’t stop the pain Adora was going through right now.

Catra cried, and so did Adora.


	6. Adora

Those weeks were the strangest Adora had ever felt. 

She had picked up information along the way about her condition. The grim details were that she was in a heavy coma, with little to no chance of waking up. What seemed to concern the doctors the most though was the little-to-no brain activity. The doctors theorized that if she didn’t wake up in about 1 month she would die. For the second time in her life, she was afraid she might die. This was worse, she decided. When she thought she was going to sacrifice herself in the Heart, she at least knew it was on her own terms, and it would’ve been a death to give the rest of the universe new life. She had to pull herself away from that line of thinking. She was reminded of Mara’s words. “You’re worth more than what you can give to other people. You deserve love too.”

She felt like she was constantly dreaming, watching everything play out in front of her from above. She was having constant trouble remembering things, but Catra was her anchor. She grounded Adora (It was funny to Adora how the person who usually made her feel like she was flying grounded her), helped her remember everything, and yet Catra had no idea how much she was helping. 

It was a good thing that Catra was the one who made Adora remember, because Catra seemed to never want to leave her side. She seemed to spend most of her time just staring at Adora, as if still constantly shocked by what had happened to her. Catra cried longer and more frequently than Adora had ever seen. Most of those times when Catra bore her heart on her sleeve Bow or Glimmer were able to be there for her, but sometimes Catra would cry, and she would be all alone. Out of everything, Adora hated watching this the most. She remembers the promise she made to Catra only hours after defeating Horde Prime. 

They had been sitting in the sun of a brand new, remade Etheria together, the four of them, for hours. Eventually Bow and Glimmer left, and it was only Adora and Catra. They were just happy to be together, knowing that they loved each other, finally free from pain, the pain of Horde Prime, the pain of being apart. Adora spoke first.  
“Catra, I promise... I promise I’ll always be there for you, from now on. I won’t make the same mistakes. I can’t...” Adora faltered “I cant lose you again.”  
“I know” Catra said quietly. “I know. I promise too.” Catra said and Adora saw her failing to fight back tears.  
“I won’t break this promise.” Adora choked through tears.  
Adora took Catra’s hand, but immediately wondered if she’d overstepped because Catra jumped back a little.  
“Oh, sorry.” Adora said, cautious to let Catra have her personal space if she wanted it.  
“No, no it’s ok.” Catra said quickly, and she grabbed Adora’s hand back and squeezed it tightly.

Adora realized watching Catra cry quietly next to Adora’s bed that she had broken another promise.

Adora watched as many people came to visit her, mostly close friends, but also people she could only vaguely recognize, nobles, Etherian and otherwise from other kingdoms and planets, and the distant families of the Princesses. Catra never left the room when Adora had visitors, she never left the room period. She watched as so many people, from Bow’s dads and brothers, to Mermista’s younger brother (who she’d met like once, and almost forgot existed), to Huntara, to even Lonnie, Kyle and Rogelio visited her, almost as if to pay respects. Sometimes Adora couldn’t stand it and yelled to no one but herself that she wasn’t dead, she was still here, but of course no one heard. Although Catra couldn’t hear her while she was in... wherever it was that she was, Catra seemed to be in sync with Adora. 

Some royal family from a planet She-Ra had helped rid of the Horde was there visiting. Although she didn’t remember most of the kings and queens that she saw visiting her comatose body, she did remember this family. They were.. very annoying to put it mildly. They had the haughty, rich, brat personality that Adora had been taught all the princesses of Etheria had. (Although the Horde had associated every negative adjective in their vocabulary to the Princesses.) Of course the princesses of Etheria were nothing like what she had been taught in the Horde, as she found out from the moment she met Glimmer. 

The Royals weren’t the least bit grateful to the best friend squad after they had just saved their entire planet from the most evil faction in the galaxy. They seemed to think they would have been fine without She-Ra, Glimmer, Bow, and Catra’s help and the only time they met the king constantly brought up how they would have been fine without “She-Ra’s intervention” as he put it. After about the fifth time the royals brought up that exact same phrase she heard Catra mutter  
“I would like to see how you would’ve turned out without She-Ra’s intervention”  
Adora elbowed Catra. Of course Adora wasn’t doing this just for the praise and thankfulness of the Royal family, it was never about that, it was about helping planets in need, and destroying the evil that is the Horde, but it wouldn’t have hurt for the Royals to be a little nicer to Adora, after all she had just spent 3 weeks fighting for the independence of the planet, for this very family to be in control again. Adora could tell Catra remembered this family after the way her spine went rigid seeing them walk in. Adora could hear the conversation the Royals were having amongst themselves. By Adora’s sleeping body  
“Oh no, what a shame.” The king said with thinly concealed sarcasm.  
“Yes, it really is just horrible seeing the invincible warrior She-Ra looking so weak.” The queen agreed.  
“It really is a tragedy what happened to her. Oh well, as they say all good things must come to an end.” The Prince replied.

Those were the words that broke Catra. She sprung up from her couch that Glimmer and Bow had set up for her close to Adora’s bed and walked over to the Royal family.  
“Ado- She-Ra isn’t dead, stop acting like she is!” Catra said starting to yell. “She’s going to survive this, she’s strong, stronger than all three of you combined will ever be.” Catra said, starting to yell.  
“She doesn’t look that strong now.” The king said quietly, but loud enough for Catra to hear. Before the king knew it, Catra had punched him square between his eyes. She would have kept going, but Glimmer must have heard the yelling, because Catra was suddenly teleported away. Glimmer then rushed the king and the family away from the room where Adora saw herself. Catra then walked back over to Adora and said softly,  
“I’m sorry Adora, but I couldn’t handle them any more.”

Adora forgave Catra.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can’t believe I have 34 Kudos! That’s 34 more than I expected, and I’m very happy people are reading this. I’m thinking my next chapter will either be from Double Trouble’s perspective, or from Catra’s again. I put in the tags that this is the 6th chapter out of 16, but that’s just a guess, it could go longer or shorter. Thanks for reading!


	7. Double Trouble

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter and the next will be very different compared to all the others, a little more focused on plot than characters, but i wanted to take a couple chapters, explain things and try out writing from Double Trouble’s perspective, because they are such an interesting character.

Double Trouble was glad to accept the role.

They were quite bored that month to be honest. They had just finished their role in Etheria’s biggest acting opportunity, the great Bright Moon Musical. The musical had taken place every year for centuries in Bright Moon, and acted as a recap of the most important events for Bright Moon and Etheria that year. It was cancelled during the Horde’s reign on Etheria, and Double Trouble was part of the first comeback show. They spent 1 month rehearsing in Bright Moon, then 3 months touring Etheria. It was the most fun they had ever had, they relished in the attention, the love of the audience. Double Trouble lived for applause. A side effect of spending one month in Bright Moon was that they spent a lot of time with Glimmer, Bow, Adora and Catra. Double Trouble grew to be somewhat fond of them, the closest they could count to having friends. Double Trouble never usually tried to make friends, emotional attachments usually just got in the way of their acting career, but it was hard for anyone not to become friends with the “Best Friend Squad”, even after everything Double Trouble had been through the last time they loved someone. 

Double Trouble was visiting Adora this weekend, because no amount of acting could change that they really did care about Adora. (Only a little bit though Double Trouble decided.) Glimmer and Bow went up to Double Trouble after they had visited Adora, and asked Double Trouble for their help. Their request summed up: infiltrate the Horde on a fact finding mission about whatever weapon was used against Adora. Double Trouble didn’t wait for Bow and Glimmer to finish before they accepted. Double Trouble didn’t really know why they didn’t hesitate to take the job. They told themselves that it was just because they were bored. It wasn’t at all because the look on Catra’s face crushed their soul, even when they pretended they didn’t care. 

So there Double Trouble was, in the middle of the Horde mothership, playing the part of Kyle. Because Kyle was a former Horde soldier and technically never went against the Horde, he was given clearance to rejoin the Horde whenever he pleased. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t a Horde clone, because the Horde had started using non Horde clone soldiers for their armies. They were desperate Double Trouble supposed. Double Trouble’s goal was to access the Horde Mainframe and bring any information they could back to Bright Moon. 

Double Trouble traversed the seemingly endless and empty hallways of the Horde’s ship. They made sure to occasionally stumble or trip so nobody questioned they were Kyle. After what seemed like forever they finally located the Horde server room and initiated the final steps of the plan. They morphed into Glimmer and started running to draw attention. As soon as a group of patrolling Horde Soldiers saw them, they ran across a corner, morphed back into Kyle, and fell to the floor pretending to be knocked out. The Horde Soldiers shook Kyle awake and asked what happened, and Double Trouble said in Kyle’s squeaky, not confident voice,  
“Princess Glimmer and the Archer Bow attacked me! I couldn’t do anything about it and they ran away!”  
“Ugh. New recruits.” Double Trouble heard one say as they ran off. By then the alarm was raised and Double Trouble morphed into a Horde Clone. They were able to go unnoticed traveling to the server room. Once in the server room, Entrapta gave them exact directions that endlessly confused Double Trouble, but they carried them out. Double Trouble knew things were going too well and wasn’t surprised when the alarm turned off and she heard footsteps behind her. The voice behind them called out, “Fancy seeing you here, my child.”  
“Hello Mother.” Double Trouble responded.


	8. Double Trouble

Double Trouble had hoped they wouldn’t run into their mother.

They had heard the rumours just as anyone else, but were one of the few people who actually knew who was now controlling the most evil group in the universe. 

Their mother spoke to Double Trouble after bringing them to her throne room.  
“You don’t seem happy to see me! I can’t imagine why.”  
When Double Trouble was younger they would have fallen for these mind games, but they were stronger now.  
“You must have misread my expression mother, I’ve missed you since the day you left me.”  
Double Trouble thought back to the day their mother left them with a traveling circus, the day everything changed. Before their mother abandoned them Double Trouble was having the best day of their life. They had always loved watching performances of anything, from plays, to music to circuses. What really made it the best day ever for them was the fact that their mother seemed to be enjoying herself, which almost never happened. With hindsight Double Trouble realizes it was because she found a way to finally get rid of the one thing that was hindering her ambitions for power, her child, Double Trouble. Double Trouble used to be so heartbroken by that fateful day, but they have moved on and learned, learned that love only caused pain. Now all that is left is indifference toward their mother. 

“Oh don’t be so sour about it love, my decision turned out well for both of us. Hey, look at us, love, who would’ve thought. On opposing sides of the war, meeting again.”  
“If I knew we were going to meet I would’ve dressed up.“ Double Trouble said  
“I see your wit is as sharp as always.” Their mother replied. “Now enough small talk, I know why you are here, it’s obvious, and I’ve been waiting a long time. It honestly took longer than I thought it would for you to come visit me. I was beginning to think you wouldn’t come at all, but here you are my child.”  
Double Trouble hated being called her child. Their Mother forfeited the right to use those words when she left them with strangers, hoping to never see them again.  
“I’ve never been one to overcomplicate things, so I’ll tell you exactly what I’m going to do with you. You’ve gained a reputation for your work and your performances. I will keep you here imprisoned in the middle of my empire until you either agree to work for me, or I figure out a way to make you work for me. I hate to admit it, but you have a talent for acting and you could prove extremely useful to me. Before I do though I will tell you exactly what I did to ‘Adora’ as she is known, because I just absolutely need to get this off my chest, the guilt is just absolutely killing me. Horde Clones make effective and obedient soldiers, but a very poor audience.”  


“I started thinking about the greatest challenge to my empire, She-Ra. I knew my chances of killing her were slim to none, but even if I could knock her out for a small amount of time, morale across the galaxy would drop. Of course the other princesses would be there, but none of them loom quite as large as the great She-Ra. So I researched. I digitized the entire Horde database of memories so I could read them, and searched far and wide for something that could knock out She-Ra. I eventually stumbled across a record of an excursion in the Northern Reaches of Etheria, with an interesting piece of ancient technology that could knock out She-Ra. The technology itself had been apparently destroyed and the lab abandoned. But I needed this technology more than anything, it was what could disable She-Ra, so I traveled personally to Etheria and was shocked to see the disc in pieces, untouched since the events I read about in the report. I really thought She-Ra would be more careful with something as dangerous as that. I brought back the pieces to my group of scientists and had them create a weapon from it. I then set up a simple enough trap involving a citizen in distress and an ambush, and tested out my weapon on She-Ra. My scientists are no Entrapta, but from what I’ve heard about poor Adora, they certainly did their job. I never dreamed this plan could go so well as to kill the She-Ra, but I suppose I’ve finally found some luck.” Double Trouble‘s mother finished her story.  
“I guess the skill in storytelling must have skipped a generation Mother dear, because that was an anything but riveting delivery.” Double Trouble said in response  
“Take them away” their mother started to say, but before she finished Double Trouble had disappeared.

When Double Trouble reappeared light years away in the Bright Moon castle they said,  
“Impeccable timing Entrapta. The back-up plan went off without a hitch.”  
“Thanks! I’m just glad you survived the trip, I wasn’t sure if reversing the Horde teleportation system would actually work or not, but I’m certainly glad it did!”  
Double Trouble didn’t have time to really think about that comment because they were swallowed up by a big hug by both Bow and Glimmer.  
“We cannot thank you enough Double Trouble. There might be a chance to help Adora now.” Glimmer said.

Double Trouble would never admit it, but they were glad to be back in Bright Moon.


	9. Catra

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright back to Catradora. This is a shorter chapter but I might write another one sooner than usual. Thanks for reading!

Catra still thought it was a nightmare.

Catra was going to wake up in Adora’s arms, and everything would to prove to only be a terrible dream. Catra knew that’s all this was, wanted it to be all this was, needed it to be all this was, and yet weeks passed without Catra waking up, and more importantly, Adora waking up. With Adora’s condition not changing for better or for worse the doctors had decided to move Adora to her and Catra’s room. Catra at first thought this would be an improvement, but it was even more painful to wake up in their bed alone than to wake up on an uncomfortable sofa. 

The days melted together with no meaning. Almost every day was the same for Catra, she would wake up, see Adora still lying on the medical bed, hooked up to a few monitors, looking as though she was having a constant nightmare, then go over and sit next to her for the rest of the day. She’d talk with her friends, eat a little, think, and cry. She remembered a few days ago Double Trouble returned with some information about what had really happened to Adora. A wave if crushing guilt came upon her. This was her fault, if she hadn’t exploited this in the Northern Reaches Adora would still be awake, living her life. If not for Catra she wouldn’t be in a coma, her days stolen from her. She briefly got her hopes up, maybe Adora could wake up only, maybe Catra’s heart could be healed, maybe everything could go back to normal. Those hopes were destined only to be dashed by the conversation between Glimmer and Entrapta.  
“So if this is caused by that first ones disc then we do what we did to help Adora last time, destroy the disc!” Glimmer had said. Entrapta has responded, as quietly as Catra had almost ever heard her,  
“No. That wouldn’t work. The disc is already broken and was only used as a power system for whatever weapon was used on Adora, we can’t break something that is already broken. This situation is different than the other times the disc infected She-Ra because the disc hasn’t affected She-Ra, the weapon powered by the disc has.”

Catra thought she knew better than to be hopeful, but apparently not, and now she was facing the costs. 

Today was just like any other day to Catra, she woke up with a sudden emptiness, and got out of bed slowly. She went over and looked at Adora feeling numb. She didn’t realize what today was. She should’ve known from the looks of extra pity given to her by Bow and Glimmer, the more cautious tone in Entrapta’s words, and how all of the other princesses asked Catra how she was. Catra hadn’t realized what day it was until her eyes wandered around the room and landed on Catra and Adora’s calendar. Catra felt numb as she realized what today was. She saw the big heart Adora had drawn on their calendar. Today was their anniversary.


	10. Catra

Today is the anniversary of the most important day in Catra’s life.

Two years ago today Catra almost lost everything, the entire galaxy almost lost everything. Catra was consumed by memories, but not of two years ago, of one year ago.

Catra knew the day would be painful for Adora. She could tell in the way the always talkative Adora shied away from conversation whenever the upcoming anniversary was brought up, she could tell by the constant nervous glances to the calendar in the days leading up to it. Catra had a tentative plan to distract Adora with a romantic evening, after all it was technically their anniversary, but she had no idea how, she had no experience in romance. So Catra went to her closest friends, Bow and Glimmer. She snuck across the hallway one night and quietly entered Bow and Glimmer’s room.  
“Bow! Glimmer! Wake up!” She whisper shouted.  
Bow stirred first.  
“Huh? Catra? Is this an emergency, what’s wrong?”  
“Yeah pretty much, I... I need your guys’ help.” She mumbled. By then Glimmer had awoken and she gave Bow a look. Bow and Glimmer did that all the time and sometimes, like now, it got on Catra’s nerves.  
“Fine I’ll figure it out myself.” Catra said  
“Catra wait, hold on.” Glimmer said. “You know we’re happy to help you with anything, we’re just confused because it’s the middle of the night.”  
“Is it about Adora?” Bow stated.  
“Well yeah, I... I kind of wanted to do something... y’know... romantic for our anniversary, so I could... keep her mind off all the other things that day means.” Catra said staring at the floor.  
“Awww!” Bow and Glimmer said in unison  
“Be quiet! You’re going to wake up Adora!”  
Bow and Glimmer snickered, then Glimmer said  
“Ok ok so you need help being... romantic?”  
“Well yeah... the Horde never taught us how to be romantic.” Catra said, blushing.  
“Well you could surprise her and take her out to dinner, that’s pretty romantic.” Said Bow.  
“And you could give her flowers, ooh! The dinner could be candlelit, and at sunset...” Bow interrupted Glimmer “Make her breakfast in bed!”  
“Yeah!”  
“Leave her notes!”  
“Compliment her!”  
“Give her a present!”  
“Write her a poem!”  
“Umm ok thanks guys I think I’m gonna go back to bed now.” Catra said.  
“Sing her a song!” Bow said.  
“Yeah!” Glimmer and Bow giggled, and then said goodnight to Catra.  
Catra walked back across the hall and crawled back into bed beside Adora. She wasn’t exactly sure how yet, but Adora was going to have the best day ever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another shorter chapter, sorry!


	11. Adora

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I took a little break, but here you go!

Adora knew what today was.

She wasn’t really sure how, but even before it was said aloud, she knew today was the anniversary of... a lot of things. Adora felt a small amount of warmth thinking about a year ago, when Catra planned a romantic day so Adora wouldn’t be haunted by the memories of Horde Prime.

Adora woke up that day with a heaviness in her soul, and anxious energy. Her anxiety increased exponentially when she woke up and Catra was nowhere to be found. Catra was always a late sleeper, so Adora usually had to wake her. Confused, Adora walked outside the bedroom into the hallway and looked around. She smelled something burning and some shouting coming from the kitchen and ran over to help. What she saw confounded her. Catra was putting out a fire in an oven while bow was trying to clean up an egg that had exploded all over the countertops, and Glimmer was yelling at the both of them. When Adora entered, everyone stopped for a moment, and the only sound was the alarm of a floating smoke detector. Glimmer then quickly teleported Adora back to her room and said,  
“Go back to sleep! You aren’t supposed to be awake for at least another ten minutes!”  
Adora, still confused and tired, decided to just sit in her bed for ten minutes. 

Eventually Catra walked into her room with a plate containing a burnt pastry and some undercooked meat. Catra looked absolutely defeated, but put on a weak smile.  
“Happy anniversary!?” She said as if it was a question  
“Um so Glimmer and Bow said it would be romantic to give you breakfast in bed, but I kind of fell asleep when the egg and pastry were cooking, I mean in my defense I woke up really early so... anyways I’m sorry it’s really bad.”  
Adora was filled with warmth. Catra, who was just as horrible at cooking as Adora was, tried her best to make her breakfast in bed. Adora didn’t care the breakfast was burnt and the meat was clearly rushed and not cooked long enough, after all, it’s the thought that counts, and Catra had apologized. It might seem like nothing, but Adora knew that even now, it was hard for Catra to apologize for anything. She had grown so much in a year, and Adora was so proud of her, but she still sometimes reverted to her old ways of not wanting to talk about her problems, and being stubborn about her mistakes. 

Adora took a very crunchy bite of the roll Catra made her, and tried her best to not make any facial expression that gave away what she really thought of the bite. After swallowing, she started to reach for another bite, but Catra stopped her.  
“You don’t have to eat that you know.”  
“No no! It’s good, thanks!” Adora said  
“Adora, I know you better than anyone else in the world, and I can read you like an open book. You do not like that roll. So just put it down, and let’s let Wrong Hordak make breakfast.”  
“Well I... okay.” Adora said “But I still think it’s really sweet that you made me breakfast in bed.”  
“Yeah, but it’s definitely not because I like you.” Catra said looking into Adora’s eyes. Adora laughed back, and in that moment, it didn’t matter how undercooked the meat was, because they loved each other.


	12. Adora

All throughout that day, Adora was showered with attention, flowers and gifts. Catra wrote her a poem, and sang her a song, and even left her notes, although she hid them very well, because Adora only found two.

It all culminated in a dinner by the river in Bright Moon at sunset, before the ball to celebrate the one year anniversary of the liberation of Etheria. Catra even brought candles, but she couldn’t figure out how to light them, and accidentally dropped one in the river. Catra brought meat, steamed vegetables, and cake for their dinner, some of Adora’s favorite foods. The meat and vegetables were a little cold, and the cake was a little smooshed, but Adora still enjoyed the meal so much, and most of all, she enjoyed being with Catra. Catra though, didn’t seem to be enjoying herself and kept guiltily glancing at the smooshed cake. After finishing their meal, Catra took the pan of cake and walked over to Adora. Before she could sit back down again however, Catra tripped and watched in horror as the cake came to be smothered all over Adora’s dress. After a moment of silence, Adora started laughing, but immediately stopped after she heard Catra quietly crying. Adora tried to comfort Catra, saying  
“Catra, I really don’t care about the cake, I can just wear another dress, it’s ok.” In a sudden outburst of emotion, Catra said,  
“No it’s not! I messed up, just like with everything else today! I was trying to give you a romantic day, but I couldn’t do it, and now I’ve ruined dinner, just like breakfast, and everything else today.” Catra shrank and put her head between her legs, continuing crying. Adora moved over next to Catra, grabbed Catra’s hand and said,  
“Hey, look at me.” Catra slowly moved her head and looked at Adora through teary eyes. “Catra, I love you, and today was the most romantic day of my life, even with cake on my dress. And by the way, I love the cake you made, even if it’s smooshed and all over my dress. I love your poems, even if they don’t rhyme. I love your notes, even if I can’t find them. I love your singing voice, even if it’s a little off-key. I appreciate and love how much you are trying, that’s what matters to me, not one dress I have to get cleaned.”  
Catra eyes opened wide for a moment, and Adora didn’t know what would happen next. Catra, delightfully surprising Adora, just simply smiled and pulled Adora in for a kiss.

That night at the ball, Catra and Adora were inseparable. They broke the rules of the traditional Etherian dance and didn’t switch partners, but nobody else seemed to mind. Mostly people just avoided them, other than the occasional conversation with the other princesses, like when Glimmer and Bow danced over to them and Glimmer quietly said “You’re welcome” to Catra. They were off in their own little world, just enjoying being close to each other, loving each other. Catra and Adora were the last couple on the dance floor that night and Glimmer and Bow had to remind them that the dance had to end at some point. Eventually, after tiring themselves out to near complete exhaustion, they walked back to their room, and spent the night cuddled close together, Adora wondering how she was lucky enough to get the best girlfriend ever.


	13. Catra

Tonight was the night of the Winter’s ball, or so Catra was reminded by Glimmer in the morning.  
“Catra, tonight is the ball, maybe you should take a break, someone else can spend time with Adora. It would be good for you to spend time with your friends.”  
“No, I want to just stay here.”  
“Ok, I get it. Well if you change your mind…”  
“Yeah. Ok.” Catra said.  
Catra wasn’t going to leave Adora ever again, because the last time she left Adora she went into a coma. Catra tried not to think about how long it had been, but she couldn’t stop herself from glancing at the calendar. 6 weeks since Adora had smiled at Catra. 6 weeks. 

Trying to distract herself with happier memories, she thought back to last winter’s ball. Before going Glimmer, Bow, Adora and Catra had been playing board games, like they did many nights, and Catra remembers one conversation well.  
“So this is the first dance you guys have been to since Princess Prom, right?” Glimmer asked  
“Uh, yeah I guess it is.” Adora responded  
“I always wondered where you guys learned to dance, you weren’t taught that in the Horde right?” Bow asked  
Catra said, “No, Shadow Weaver definitely did not teach us how to waltz.” Everyone laughed at her joke, and Catra found herself unconsciously smiling.  
“I actually kind of just picked it up that day while dancing.” Catra continued. Adora’s jaw dropped. “What!? It took me two hours of studying to perfect the traditional Etherian waltz!”  
“You didn’t really perfect it.” Catra joked. Adora shoved her and said  
“Well you were the one who kept stepping on my toes!”  
“That was on purpose, dumbo.”  
“Oh sure.” They both laughed, and Catra felt the warmth she was growing accustomed to being in Bright Moon with her friends and girlfriend.

Sitting there in the silence of the room, Catra found herself lost in the memories of that night. Then a stunning realization brought her back to the present, filling her heart with an icy fear and taking away her breath. The room was silent. Adora’s heart monitor wasn’t beeping. Catra kept looking at the heart monitor screen in denial, and refusing to believe that it was only a flatline she saw. But that’s what it was, and when she accepted it she screamed Adora’s name, her tears quickly wetting Adora’s robe. After a few seconds Glimmer and Bow appeared in the room, dressed in their formal ball attire. After realizing what Catra had, Glimmer shook her head fiercely, and Bow endlessly repeated the word no. 

Everyone was silent when the doctors put a sheet over Adora’s body, and took her away. Catra should have been crying, should have been overcome with emotion, but instead she felt nothing, she just felt empty. That’s all she was, an empty shell of herself, no emotions remained. She had nothing left to give to the world, and she was so cold inside.

She found herself visiting Adora often down by the river, the same place they had their anniversary picnic was now where Adora rested forever. Catra would talk to Adora, tell her how much she loved her, tell her how much she missed her. She brought flowers, Adora’s favorites. Adora never said I love you back. Catra didn’t sleep at night, often didn’t notice when people were talking to her, and stared politely right on through conversations. It was Catra’s worst nightmare, and it had come to fruition. She didn’t honestly know how she was going to make it, but she kept living, hour by hour, day by day, just as Adora would want her to. 

...

Catra woke up in a cold sweat, jumped up and went over to Adora. She sighed a breath of relief as she saw the love of her life breathing. Still in a coma, but alive, and for now, that was all Catra needed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I wasn’t actually gonna kill off Adora, at least not yet, but I liked toying with the idea, especially on unlucky chapter 13.


	14. Catra

Catra was beginning to wonder how much more of this she could take.

It had been 7 weeks now since Adora’s accident, but Catra was starting to lose the concept of time. The sun still came up, and it still set, but everything was different. She was having more and more nightmares about Adora’s death, and the worst part was they were all so real. Catra got very little sleep, she was afraid that she would wake up and Adora would be gone in the morning, gone forever in the night. Glimmer was very worried about Catra, she spent a lot of time with her, trying to engage in conversations, trying to distract her. Catra didn’t want to be distracted, because if she wasn’t paying attention, and Adora died, Catra would never forgive herself. Adora would be all alone, Catra didn’t want her to be all alone, she knew how that felt, Adora doesn’t deserve to die like that.

Catra just watched and waited as more and more time passed. Catra had heard how time heals everything, but she didn’t believe it. For three years Catra still felt the same pain she did the first night after Adora left the Horde. Time didn’t help then, it wasn’t going to help her now, and she doubted anything would. 

On the 60th night without Adora in bed next to her, Catra had her worst nightmare yet. She couldn’t fall asleep again that night, she didn’t think she could ever fall asleep again, so she sat by Adora’s side until dawn. The day went just like any other, Glimmer and Bow came for their morning, afternoon, and evening visits, brought food with them each time, and tried to cheer Catra up. As with any other day, it didn’t work, Catra couldn’t be cheered up. 

As the sun set that day, Catra noticed a little white slip underneath the little plant Adora had put on their windowsill. She lifted up the plant and unfolded the paper. It was a simple drawing of a heart. It was one of the notes Catra had left for Adora on their anniversary. It was the note that broke Catra, months of emotions she tried to keep inside came out. She sobbed, and started to quietly speak to Adora.  
“Adora, what have I done. What have I done! I promised I’d look out for you, protect you, and I didn’t! I should have been there, but I wasn’t. I was at a spa, a spa, while you were fighting for your life. How could I?! I broke my promise again Adora, and I swore to myself I never would. Look what’s happened to you now! I’m a horrible person, I deserve pain, but you, you don’t. I’ve already hurt you so much, so much more than you deserved. I’m so sorry Adora, I should be the one in a coma right now, not you. I’m so, so sorry Adora!” Catra finished, screaming. She was shaking and sobbing, and she didn’t notice Adora’s body start to slowly move. Catra continued “I… I miss you Adora, I miss you so much. I can’t go on without you. I need you. I just want to hold you. I love you. Come back!” Glimmer and Bow had entered the room by now, hearing Catra’s hysterical crying, and started to comfort her before stopping in their tracks. Catra looked up through tears. What she saw she had been dreaming for for months. Adora was slowly opening her eyes, slowly waking up. Catra wanted nothing more than to tackle her with the biggest hug she could possibly give, but she didn’t think Adora’s frail body could handle it. Instead she cautiously waited, thinking she was just seeing things, for Adora to open her eyes completely, to be awake for the first time in over eight weeks. When the moment finally came, Catra looked into Adora’s eyes, and Adora stared back. Catra knew Adora’s eyes, they were the eyes of the person she knew better than anyone but herself. She had loved those eyes her entire life, pretended to herself she hated them for years, had found happiness and peace in them, and had longed for them for 60 days and nights. Catra knew Adora’s eyes. Those weren’t Adora’s eyes.


	15. Bow

Bow couldn’t believe it was finally happening. Adora was waking up.

Bow had been waiting for this for months, all of Etheria had been waiting for this for months. He had almost completely lost hope Adora was actually going to wake up, it had been two months with zero indication Adora was even still in there. None of that mattered now though, because unless his eyes were playing tricks on him, Adora was waking up.

He looked at one of his closest friends. She looked completely dazed and confused, and something about her was off, but Bow couldn’t tell what. When Adora first looked at the three of them Catra seemed to back away a little. Catra must have seen something was off with Adora, just like him. Glimmer glanced at Bow, then inquired, “Adora?” Adora disregarded the question, and looking at Catra, said, “Who are you? You have really pretty eyes.” Catra stared back in horror, and slowly backed away from Adora and out of the room. Bow heard her running footsteps as for the first time in two months, Catra left Adora. Bow was shocked, and turned to Adora and asked  
“Adora, do you know who we are?”  
“No, should I? Where am I by the way?”  
“Oh no. This is bad.” Bow said, stating the obvious.

Entrapta diagnosed Adora with complete memory loss.  
Entrapta had said “ Yea she seems to remember absolutely nothing. That would make sense with the little brain activity.” After a moment Entrapta quickly added, “Oh, sorry, that’s a little insensitive. My bad.” then went back to studying Adora’s behavior. 

No one knew where Catra had run off to, so with Glimmer staying by a memory-less Adora, Bow was tasked to find her. He searched all of Catra’s favorite spots, and eventually found her on the roof, sitting with her knees close to her chest, staring at the stars. Catra, surprisingly, spoke first.  
“That’s my earliest memory of her.”  
“What is?”  
“Some random Horde cadet had bullied me about my heterochromia. I barely knew Adora all those years ago, but she immediately tried to make me feel better. She said ’Catra, don’t listen to him, you have really pretty eyes.’ Not exactly the most profound statement ever, but it changed my life. She changed my life, she was my first and only friend. But that girl… that’s not the Adora I know. I promised myself I’d stay by Adora, but that’s not her.”  
Catra broke down into tears. Although Catra crying still surprised Bow, Bow thought that after repressing and hiding her emotions for so many years, Catra must have endless rivers of tears to cry. Bow moved next to her and said  
“Catra, I know, I know how hard it is to see Adora like that. But I swear I will do everything I can to help her. There has to be some way, some gadget, some spell…”  
“No. I’m done feeling hopeful. It’s not worth the pain. I was hopeful for two months and look what happened. I got my hopes up and watched them fall.”  
Bow paused for a moment, then spoke.  
“You can’t give up hope Catra, you can’t, no matter how hard it is. Adora wouldn’t want you to give up on her. She would want you to stay strong. Have hope about Adora for Adora.”  
Bow put his arm around Catra and wrapped her up in a hug. Catra cried, for a long time. After quieting down a bit, she said, “O-okay. I’ll try. Only because I like her. Don't ever tell her that though.”  
“I won’t” Bow chuckled.


	16. Bow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can’t believe I have this many kudos! Thanks so much for reading, and a special thank you to the 11 people who have bookmarked it!

Of all the things Bow thought could happen to Adora, memory loss was not one of them.

Bow absolutely hated seeing her like this, everyone did. Adora didn’t remember anyone or anything, but she seemed to have occasional flashbacks, and she had constant headaches. 

After their talk on the roof, Catra seemed to loosely hang around Adora. Catra was ever present in the background, and yet avoided direct conversation with Adora, subtly shied away when Adora asked about her. 

With Glimmer being constantly busy with duties as a Bright Moon royal, and Catra hiding in the background, Bow became Adora’s caretaker. He didn’t really need to take care of her though, because she could handle herself, Bow’s duties were more about answering any questions she had, keeping her out of trouble, and helping her get from place to place. Bow had also been tasked with slowly introducing her to her life, so he kept her away from her room, and from the public, at least for now. The story they told Adora was that she was a bright moon resident, one of Bow and Glimmers friends, who had lost her memory after an accident. The idea was to warm her up to the truth, and hopefully by the time they told her the full truth they would have figured out a way to help her get her memories back.

Bow didn’t really know what to do with her for fun, he had no idea what this Adora’s interests were. They played childish games, like hide and seek, they tried sparring, one of Adora’s favorite activities, but without her years of training at the Horde she was easily beaten, even by Bow. It was eerie, she was a complete stranger to Bow in her speech patterns, mannerisms and personality, but she looked exactly like the best friend he had known for five years.

One day while playing hide and seek, things went a little bit wrong. Adora loved the game and was particularly good at it. It helped her get used to Bright Moon, which could be confusing to walk around. That day Adora could not be found by Bow. He checked all of the places he could think of within the boundaries they laid out, but could not find her. When searching one of the hallways he heard talking coming from Catra and Adora’s room. That either meant Catra was talking to herself, or Adora had hid in her room, where she wasn’t supposed to, either way not a good situation. He entered the room, and saw Catra clutching a photo frame, and this conversation between Catra and Adora,  
“Adora, can you please leave, you aren’t supposed to be in here.”  
“I don’t understand. Why are there pictures of me here, with you, I don’t even know you. Why do I recognize this room, and why do you say my name like that?”  
”What do you mean like that?”  
“Like you care about me, like you’ve said that name thousands of times.”  
Catra stared at Adora with surprise and deep sadness, not hidden well.  
“Umm hey Catra!” Bow said. ”Adora, remember we said we weren’t allowed to hide in here, this is someone’s room.”  
“But I want to know where she got that picture, I don’t remember taking it.”  
Bow panicked, and had no idea how to get himself out of this situation. Thinking on his feet, which he wasn’t the best at, Bow said,  
“Well I think you just thought it looked like you, it’s kind of a blurry photo. That’s actually Catra’s friend… Aroda, but unfortunately she passed away a few months ago.”  
That lie hurt Bow deeply, and from the wounded look on her face, it looked like it hurt Catra too. Adora seemed to accept the explanation, or at least she didn’t ask any more questions. They left Catra’s room and continued their day, but something had changed in Adora. 

The lie worked in delaying the inevitable, after all, the best lies contain truth in them.


	17. Catra

Just when Catra had had a brief shining moment of hope, an end to the dark arduous tunnel she was traveling through, it quickly caved in on her. Adora, or at least the Adora that was Catra’s soulmate, didn’t wake up, someone else did.

Catra had gotten what she wanted, hadn’t she? Adora was awake, was alive, was walking, and talking. Catra’s greatest wishes had come true, right? Except the only thing was, that wasn’t Adora. Whoever it was that inhabited her Adora’s body, Catra was sure it wasn’t Adora. Technically, Catra had gotten what she wanted, yet in a cruel twist of fate, this Adora left Catra more alone than a comatose Adora ever could. The Adora that had no idea who Catra was. Whenever she began to think about it, about Adora having absolutely no idea who she was, all of the little positive emotions she still felt left her. She couldn’t think about it, couldn’t think about how the woman she was sure she was going to spend the rest of her life with, both in the Horde and when living in Bright Moon, didn’t even know her name. How she didn’t know the touch of Catra’s hand, she didn't know the warmth of Catra’s embrace, even when that’s all Catra wanted to do, hold her hand, wrap her up in her arms. She couldn’t though, because Adora would run scared, Adora would back away. Adora wouldn’t love her back, and that train of thought hurt her more than anything else. Adora doesn’t love Catra, and there is nothing Catra can do. It was one of the worst things to ever happen in Catra’s entire life.

Adora slept in the room across the hallway and to the right of Catra’s room, the very same room Catra slept in during her first couple nights at Bright Moon. Catra was too stubborn to sleep in the same room as Adora back then. She thought she’d be fine without Adora, but loneliness proved to be a bigger factor than she had planned for. It had killed her because after years of her dreams being filled with Adora’s warm presence next to her, only to wake up to the chilling, cold Horde, Adora was a few steps away. Every night she snuck into Adora’s room, curled up at her feet as quietly as possible, and left before Adora awoke. Catra did this for about a week, her plan going off without a hitch, until one night out of the blue Adora said  
“I’ve got another pillow next to me y’know. You always call me the idiot, but you’d be a lot more comfortable if you just slept next to me.”  
Catra slowly moved up next to Adora. She looked into Adora’s eyes and blushed.  
“How long have you known?”  
With a smug look on her face Adora said,  
“The whole time.”  
“This doesn’t change the fact that you’re an idiot, you know that right?”  
Catra shoved Adora and she giggled.  
“Yeah, I know.”   
Adora took Catra’s hand, and it felt perfect in hers.

On one of the many nights when she couldn’t sleep, memories and thoughts filling her head, Catra heard a small whimper coming from Adora’s room. It was quiet enough for Catra to question if she even heard it, but she went to check on Adora anyway. Adora was shaking and sweating, she looked like she was having a horrible nightmare. Catra ran over on to the bed, her instinct to protect Adora. She took Adora, cradled her in her arms and said,  
“Adora it’s okay, it’s just a nightmare, wake up.”  
Something shifted in Adora as she began to relax, and opened her eyes. For a brief moment Catra saw Adora, the real Adora in those eyes, but that brief moment disappeared quickly, and Catra was left staring at eyes alien to her. Adora said,  
“Ca-catra. I... know you. I think I know you. How do I know you? Why can’t I remember?!” Catra wanted to tell her. Catra wanted to tell her that she knew Catra because they’d been best friends their entire lives, they’d been in love without knowing what love was, then spent years full of tears on opposite sides of a horrible war. They went through more pain, then were finally reunited. Catra had thought back then they’d get their happy ending, but she guessed not. Catra couldn’t bring herself to tell her that, because Adora wouldn’t be able to handle it, so Catra just hushed Adora and told her gently to go back to sleep. After a few minutes she eventually did, and seemed to drift away into calmer dreams. As soon as Catra got up from the bed though, Adora’s eyes bolted awake.  
“Wait! Please… stay.”  
Catra was left speechless. She took a deep breath after a couple tears rolled down her cheek. She wiped them away, and sat on the same chair she had sat in for weeks waiting for Adora to wake up. She stayed awake all night, like she would’ve done in her own bed. She studied Adora, wondering why she looked exactly the same, but was a completely different person than the Adora Catra loved.

Catra left at dawn.


	18. Catra

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoa, people left like 20 kudos in the past couple days, THANK YOU SO MUCH! I really, really appreciate it, and I hope you guys are enjoying. This chapter is a little on the shorter end but filled to the brim with Catradora. Thanks for reading!

Catra walked down the hill.

It was a warm day, with the slightest breeze. The bright blue sky was dotted with puffy clouds. The afternoon sun heated the ground, and the cacophony of animals that had come alive after the heart had been disabled filled the air with sound.

Adora was waiting for her on a picnic blanket.   
“Hey Adora.” Catra said. Catra seated herself cross legged on the blanket next to Adora, and started eating. Adora smiled at her, but it was tainted by an unbearable sadness.  
“Adora, what’s wrong? It’s a beautiful day, you brought great food, everything’s perfect.”  
“You’re dreaming.”  
Catra paused for a moment. She sighed, and looked down at the ground.  
“Yeah, I know.”  
Tears began to fall from her face as she said,  
“I… I wish you’d come back, I miss you so much.”  
Adora wiped Catra’s tears away with her hand and touched her cheek.  
“I know, I know.” She pulled Catra close to her and Catra put her head on Adora’s shoulder.   
“You’re going to get through this Catra, I know you will, you are so, so strong.”   
“I’m really trying to be strong, but it’s so hard, it’s so hard seeing you not love me. My whole world has unraveled before my eyes, and I don’t know what to do. Everyone else is acting like everything is fine, but it’s not, it’s so not.”  
“They’re just coping differently Catra, everyone handles things in their own ways.” Adora paused and said, “Catra, please promise me that no matter what happens to me, you'll never let go of your friends. Please try to rely on them instead of keeping all your emotions inside, no one deserves to go through that alone, and all people want to do is help.”   
“But I feel like this is my fault, I feel like I deserve this.”  
Adora looked Catra straight in her eyes and shook her head.  
“Catra what on Etheria would make you think that?!”  
“Are you kidding, I took over innocent towns, I hurt so many people, I almost destroyed the entire world, and I killed Angella.”  
“Catra, remember when I found you wandering Bright Moon at night about a year and a half ago? You weren’t forgiving yourself, you couldn’t sleep, keeping yourself awake with guilt. Catra, forgiveness Isn’t about forgetting your mistakes, it’s about accepting them. The other princesses know what you’ve done, and they forgive you. Bright Moon knows what you’ve done, and they forgive you. The only person who won’t forgive you is yourself. I love you despite what you’ve done, it’s time for you to love yourself, because you are a good person in your heart Catra, an amazing person, even if you’ve done bad things.”  
Catra looked back into Adora’s eyes, and quietly accepted what Adora said.  
“What did I do to deserve you?”  
“You were Catra, that’s what you did, you were beautiful, smart, kind, strong Catra.”  
Catra kissed Adora’s lips and realized how much she missed doing that. They laid down and looked at the clouds, Catra holding Adora’s hand, never ever wanting to let go.

Time passed too quickly, and eventually Catra did have to let go of Adora’s hand.  
“Catra, it’s time for me to go now.” Adora said. Catra’s face dropped along with her ears. Adora kissed Catra on the cheek, then stood up and started walking away.   
“Wait, Adora.” Catra said.  
Adora looked back with gentle eyes.  
“I love you.” Catra said.  
“I love you too.” And with one last look, Adora walked away and disappeared into Catra’s dream.

Catra woke up, certain she still felt the warmth of Adora kiss in her cheek, and the comfort of Adora’s hand in hers. The dream was so real, like Adora really was there, wasn’t completely gone. That warmth from the beautiful dream quickly slipped out of Catra’s fingers, and she faced the reality that she was living a nightmare.

She traversed the hallways of the castle aimlessly, walking laps around the entire place. She frequently stopped to check on a sleeping, memory-less Adora, and she was always fine, lost in whatever she was dreaming about. She walked and walked, and thought and thought until the sun started to peek out over the landscape. She still kept on walking, walking and hoping. Hoping Adora would pop out of the corner and give her a hug, and remember everything, and it wouldn’t be a dream, her nightmare would finally be over. She passed every corner of the castle, and Adora was never there, and Adora might not ever be again.


	19. Adora

It was a strange reality for Adora.

Adora was filled with constant confusion, even the simplest things felt wrong, and she couldn’t pinpoint why. It felt wrong when she slept in her bed, she felt strangely alone and cold. It felt wrong when she woke up, like she was forgetting something, something important. It felt wrong simply talking to her friends, Bow and Glimmer, there was something they were hiding, a tenseness even in moments where they were all laughing. She had traces of dreams in her head, dreams about bright picnics with someone, dreams just beyond her grasp. She became so mad at herself. Why couldn’t she remember, when it was obviously so important to remember, remember something, anything. Most of all, Adora felt a sense of emptiness, like she was missing something, something really important.

The story she had heard from Bow and Glimmer upon awakening was that she was a citizen of Bright Moon, Bow and Glimmer’s best friend, and she lost her memory after hitting her head bad, supposedly after falling from somewhere high up. Adora knew something was wrong with that story, mostly because of Catra.

It somehow all centered around Catra. Something about the way Catra looked at Adora, and the way Adora felt about Catra, despite not even knowing her made Adora know the story was wrong. Adora knew Catra somehow, and Catra was important to her, yet according to Catra herself, they were barely acquainted. Nevertheless with every glance, Catra had presented a sense of familiarity, of comfort in Adora’s cold, confusing reality. Adora needed Catra, and she didn’t really know why, so she constantly tried to talk to her, to get to know her, and figure out what it is about her that made her feel at home. She couldn’t though, because Catra avoided her at every chance she could.

After days of trying to find Catra, and trying to speak to Catra, Adora made very little progress. Catra confounded Adora with her actions, one minute she was sneaking glances at Adora, the next she was acting rude and cold to her. Adora was finally fed up with Catra’s actions, and she was the type to assert herself, or at least she thought. The reality was that Adora didn’t even know herself, didn’t understand her own personality.

Adora, Glimmer, and Bow were playing one of their favorite games, the “Cones of Dunshire” that night, and after she took her turn, she excused herself to go to the bathroom. She moved as quietly as she could, opened the door quickly, and grabbed the arm of Catra. Adora had correctly predicted that Catra would be outside listening in, and now she was finally going to be able to talk to Catra without her walking away.  
Catra squirmed and tried to get away from Adora, but Adora made sure to have a grip as strong as steel.  
“Let me go!” Catra said through gritted teeth. In a moment of anger and frustration, Catra scratched Adora with her claws. Adora let go, occupied with the pain, and Catra’s eyes opened wide at the wound she had just caused. She then stared, horrified, at her claws, as if she couldn’t believe what she had done, and tears started to fall from her face. Adora didn’t understand what was going on, and she backed away slowly from Catra, cradling her bleeding wrist, scared.  
“No. No, no no.” Catra said, filled with remorse.  
“I’m so, so sorry I didn’t mean to do that Adora.” Catra spoke softly with deep caring in her voice, and moved over to help Adora. She used her claws to cut off a slice of a curtain, and began wrapping it around Adora’s arm.  
“I promised myself I’d never, ever hurt you again. But I’ve never been good at keeping promises, have I Adora?” Catra sadly smiled.  
“I… I don’t understand.” Adora said.  
Catra sighed. “That’s okay.” It almost sounded like Catra was trying to convince herself it was okay. Catra squeezed Adora’s hand gently and then walked away, leaving Adora a confused and emotional mess.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry guys, I haven’t posted in a few days. See if you can catch the Parks and Rec reference in the chapter, and otherwise I hope you enjoy, I can’t believe how many people like my story!


	20. Adora

Adora walked back into the room after a few minutes of quiet crying. Glimmer and Bow looked at her as she entered the room, looked at her tear streaked face, looked at her bandaged arm.   
“Adora? Are you okay? What happened?” Glimmer said.   
“I want to know who I am. Who I really am. I’m not taking no for an answer.”   
Bow and Glimmer shared a look. Glimmer nodded, then Bow sighed.   
“Ok, but it’s a really long story.”

…

Adora was left speechless. She understood the missing part of herself now, understood it well.   
“Thank you guys, thank you so much.” Adora grabbed her friends in a hug, then ran off to find Catra. Everything was clearer now, so much clearer. It wasn’t that she remembered everything now, she didn’t, but her entire life made more sense now, something inside her clicked. It was a feeling very hard for her to describe, but it was as if a weight had lifted from her shoulders, everything had been covered with a fog before now. The new clarity in her was bittersweet however, because now she had the full scope of everything she had, had before she forgot, and everything she lost. She lost her connection with the love of her life, was mentally separated from someone with whom she was inseparable. She lost her two best friends, Bow and Glimmer, her friends who had literally changed her life five years ago. She lost all of her friends, from the princesses to Huntara to even Kyle.  
“Catra, where are you?!” She shouted. Adora was searching everywhere, and could not find Catra anywhere. She found herself wandering to a somewhat familiar hallway, almost drawn to a somewhat familiar door. It was just like any of the other doors, except for a small carving of a heart that contained the letters C and A. In that instant Adora had a flash of her past life in her eyes, a memory of Adora asking Catra to carve their initials on the door. Catra had thought it was really stupid, but said she couldn’t say no to Adora. Not realizing she just remembered something from her past life, she opened the door and walked in. She looked around at the brightly painted walls, remembering how Catra and she had painted them together, looked at the swing they bought but couldn’t figure out how to build right, and the picture of the two of them framed by their bed. She caught glimpses of all these memories in a place she held dear, and it all felt so normal, so right, that she didn’t understand she was getting glimpses of a life stolen from her.

After spending some time distracted by this room, where everything felt perfect, she refocused on her mission of finding Catra. Giving up on finding her in Bright Moon, Adora walked down to the riverside, following a hunch. She found Catra exactly where she thought she would be, leaned up against a tree, looking at the water.   
“I don’t really want to talk right now.” She said, barely glancing at Adora.  
“Catra…” Adora said with emotion that surprised even herself. Catra’s ears perked up and she moved her head to look at Adora. Adora walked over to Catra and sat down in the green grass shining in the sunset. Adora was so confused about her feelings towards Catra, even more now after hearing her life story, and how much she loved Catra. She barely knew her, only met her less than a dozen times but there was something within her calling for Catra. She had absolutely no reason to, but she was pretty sure she loved Catra.   
“I heard that Glimmer and Bow told you the truth.”  
“Yeah, yeah they did…” Adora sighed.   
“I understand a lot better now Catra. And I’m just here to say, I’m sorry, I’m really sorry. I can’t imagine what you are going through right now, what you have been going through. It’s gotta be pretty hard to see me, not… be me, and I’m so sorry.”  
“Stop apologizing, I know you think you have to take on every single living being's problems, but I’m fine, I’ve been fine and I will be fine. “  
“Catra, we both know that’s not true. You don’t have to hide your feelings. I’m not the Adora that you love, but I promise I’ll be there for you if you need someone to talk to. And I promise that I will do everything I can to help you get your Adora back.”  
Catra just took a deep breath and sighed. Catra’s face was turned away and Adora couldn’t read it. After a few minutes Adora got up quietly and left.


	21. Glimmah

Glimmer found herself having hope for the first time in a long time. 

With Adora knowing the truth, there seemed to be a certain buzz around the castle that was missing before, everyone was energized again to find a way to help Adora. Multiple long forgotten spells had been attempted on Adora, all of them to no avail. Local healers had created special potions that they claimed could heal anything. Adora just spit them out in disgust. 

Despite that, things seemed to be looking up somewhat, and Glimmer was ecstatic to get the weight off her chest of telling Adora who she was. It was uncanny how much Adora acted like, well Adora. Sometimes Glimmer found herself forgetting all that had happened in the past couple months. Those happy moments were usually quickly spoiled when Bow brought up an inside joke and Adora was left confused. 

With ideas starting to run out of how to heal Adora, Bow suggested visiting Madame Razz to see if she could help. Glimmer had interacted with Madame Razz about once, and was unsure of her apparent magic. She walked through the whispering woods with Bow, trying to find Madame Razz’s abode.   
“Have you ever met her?” Glimmer asked.  
“No, I haven’t, but from what I’ve heard of her from Adora, I’m really excited to.”  
“How’s the tracker pad working?”  
“Pretty good actually, all thanks to my amazing technological genius, and... a little bit of help from Entrapta.” Glimmer laughed.

After a long time walking Bow and Glimmer finally found Madame Razz’s house in the woods.  
“Madame Razz? Can we come in, we’re Bow and Glimmer, friends of Adora.” Bow called out.  
Madame Razz peeked her head out of her house and scanned Bow and Glimmer, scrunching her nose. After a moment of consideration, Madame Razz’s said  
“Ah Mirka and Keers! Long time no see dearies, come in, come in!”  
Glimmer gave Bow a confused look and Bow just shrugged. They walked into the modest home and Razz said “Sit down, sit down! I’ve got some tea ready for us!”  
“Did you know we’d be coming?” Glimmer asked.  
“Oh yes dearie, I knew it was only a matter of time. Mara is hurting.”   
“Well no, Adora has lost her memories.”  
Madame Razz just stared at Glimmer. Bow cleared his throat and said  
“So… we were wondering if you knew anything that could help Adora get her memories back?”  
“Hmm. I’m sorry dearies, I’m not sure if Razz can help with that, but I have the berries for you!”  
“What berries?” Bow asked.  
“Oh silly Keers, you always were a goofball.”  
“Madame Razz, he’s not Keers, we don’t even know who that is.”  
“Mirka have you forgotten about your best friend Keers?! And they say Razz”s memory is bad! Ha!” Madame Razz chuckled.  
“Ugh.” Glimmer said.  
Seconds later, Sea Hawk poked his head into the house and said   
“Mermista darling, are you in there?”   
Bow, Glimmer, and Razz all stared at Sea Hawk, and Sea Hawk stared back, his eyes darting between the three of them.   
“Hmm, heh heh.” She Hawk said, then walked away hurriedly.

After making some more basic conversation and getting nowhere, Glimmer decided they should leave. Because Madame Razz insisted, they took the berries with them. Overall their mission was a complete waste of time and Glimmer felt like it was her fault. Bow seemed to sense Glimmer’s feelings and took her hand.  
“Hey, it’s gonna be okay.”  
Glimmer gave him a weak smile.


	22. Glimmer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really sorry for exceeding my own deadline in this one, I’ll try to finish the last couple chapters in quick succession. Anyway, as always hope you enjoy, and if you are still reading, thank you so much!!

Glimmer walked, defeated, through the entrance of Bright Moon.

Glimmer came upon a scene with several people huddled in a group talking. They all turned around when she entered. She saw her dad, Entrapta, and Adora look at her with bright, hopeful faces. She couldn’t bring herself to meet Adora’s eyes. They all seemed to know how it went with Razz before she spoke a word. Micah went over to Glimmer and gave her a hug.  
“Don’t worry, we’ll find a way.”  
Glimmer hoped so, but she was starting to be filled with doubt. As her eyes became clouded by tears, she heard the sound she had been expecting, Catra running away. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath and wiped away tears. She gave her father a look, and he seemed to understand. She gave him the basket of berries, and walked away.

Glimmer knew she had to help support Catra in any way she could, Catra really didn’t have too many other people to go to, and Adora wouldn’t want her to be alone. As Glimmer walked to Catra and Adora’s room she gently reached up and knocked twice. There was no response. Glimmer knocked again twice.  
“I’m fine, you can leave.” She heard.  
“Catra, I’m here for you, I’m here for you.”  
After a moment Glimmer heard a quiet crying. She sat down with her back against the door.  
“Catra I… I'm so sorry. I couldn’t help her this time. I’m not gonna stop trying though… I’m never gonna stop trying. I don’t care how long it takes, or what I have to do. Adora means so much to me, but I know she means so much more to you. You’ve gone through so much more than anyone should have to go through, but you are so strong, stronger than anyone I know.”  
Glimmer heard light footsteps walking over to the door, and heard Catra sit down and rest her back against the door.  
“It’s gonna be okay, it has to be.” Glimmer said, now crying. We just have to be strong, and brave, just like Adora would want us to be. I’ll be right beside you the whole way Catra, I promise I will.”  
Just then Bow came around the corner with a look of sadness, but quiet determination. He sat down and kissed Glimmer on the forehead.  
“Catra, hey. We love you Catra, we’re here for you, anything you need.”  
“We haven’t spent enough time together lately Catra. I’m sorry for that, we’ve just been so busy. We miss you Catra, we really miss you. We know what you are going through, and we’re here to talk, to give you a hug, to just be around, whatever you need. We both know Adora wouldn’t want you to isolate yourself, she’d want you to be open, to share the burden of what you are going through with us.”  
“We’re worried about you Catra. You do know it’s okay to need a hug sometimes.” There was a long silence before Glimmer heard Catra stand up, and so Bow and Glimmer did too. The door handle slowly turned, and the door cracked open to reveal Catra’s tear streaked face. After a moment she opened the door wider, and attacked Bow and Glimmer with a hug filled to the brim with love. They stood there in the warmth of their friendship for a few minutes before they heard loud, pounding footsteps. 

“Glimmer! Glimmer!” Micah shouted.  
“Dad what is it? Is something wrong?”  
Glimmer’s question was answered quickly by the almost absurdly cheerful expression on her father’s face. He smiled broadly and said  
“We found a way to help Adora.”

Glimmer, Catra, Bow, and Micah all sprinted to Entrapta’s lab. Entrapta, Adora, and Castaspella were hunched over a table looking at something Entrapta seemed to be testing. Upon noticing that they had entered, Entrapta turned around and squealed.  
“Isn’t it amazing!? We found a way that appears to have an 86.4 percent chance of healing Adora’s memories!”  
“Wait what? What is it?” Catra asked.  
Entrapta picked up what was on the table and showed it to the group. It was the berries given to Glimmer by Madame Razz. Her father spoke up.  
“I don’t know how I didn’t see it sooner! We’re just lucky your Aunt Castaspella saw them before I was about to throw them away! She realized what I hadn’t, these berries are exceedingly rare, and combined with a little magic, have the property to heal almost any ailment.” There was silence as everyone’s breath seemed to be taken away. Maybe Madame Razz wasn’t as crazy as Glimmer thought.

Glimmer’s hope found a way back to her heart.


	23. Catra

Catra didn’t really have time to process the information.

Everyone immediately started rushing around, Glimmer went to find ancient texts about the spell they’d have to use, Bow went to notify the other princesses, and the rest helped Entrapta with her research, bringing her scientific equipment and tools. Because everyone had thought the berries were legend, no one quite knew how to actually work the spell. Entrapta was trying to find out using science, and Glimmer was researching in the Bright Moon library with Bow’s dads. 

With all the hustle and bustle, Catra didn’t really know what to do. She tried to help, but couldn’t really find a way to, and when she did, she was told   
“It’s okay Catra, you can just sit down over there if you want.”  
Catra definitely did not want to just sit in the corner, she’d already wasted too much of her time doing that, and she really wanted to help. She wanted to keep herself busy, because if she did just sit and watch from the corner, she might be alone with her thoughts. Catra didn’t really have time to process the information, the information that after all this time, Adora might finally be coming back, and she didn’t really want to. In a way she was glad things were moving so quickly, even if she felt as though she was getting left behind a bit. 

…

After hours of Glimmer and Entrapta’s research, the group finally decided they knew enough to use the spell. While Glimmer and Micah were practicing drawing the spell, Entrapta gave the rest a briefing. Catra learned that to properly restore Adora’s memory, the spell had to be performed in a place that was hugely significant to Adora, it brought back a lot of memories. They had to find the most important place for Adora. 

Silence passed for only a moment before Entrapta interrupted it.  
“I of course brainstormed 17 ideas, grouped by general kingdom. The most likely places though are Bright Moon and the former Fright Zone.”  
“Well then let’s go. Let’s help Adora.” Catra said. 

They went through Entrapta’s list one by one, starting with Darla. Catra made sure to stay back, not wanting to mess with the spell. After they determined that Darla wasn’t the place, they traveled to the Fright Zone, thinking it was sure to be the most likely place. After trying the training simulator that had a hole in the roof, and was now a beautiful garden, they went to Adora and Catra’s former bunk room. This room had been turned into a small orphanage, along with several other rooms that the horde had used. Neither of the places worked. Catra, along with everyone else, was starting to get confused. Pretty much everyone had agreed that those were two of the most likely places, yet neither worked. Catra had another idea. She led them to the roof, and they all looked out across Scorpia’s beautiful kingdom. It was a completely different landscape, almost alien to Catra. A thought was planted in Catra’s head, but she pushed it aside for now. Catra climbed back down a level while the spell was performed. She watched from the distance as the spell failed yet again.

When everyone climbed down to where Catra was, she heard Castaspella say  
“I don’t understand, shouldn’t it have worked here? She spent 18 years of her life here.”  
Catra spoke up. “No, because this isn’t the place we grew up. It’s changed too much, for the better of course, but it’s changed. I barely recognize my way around.”   
“She’s right. That makes the only probable place Bright Moon.” Micah said.

And so they traveled back to Bright Moon, walked in the familiar doors, and entered the hallways of her home. They all knew where to go, and walked right down into Catra and Adora’s room. Everyone entered, but Catra.   
“Catra I don’t think you’ll hurt anything by being in there.” Bow said.  
“I think I’ll just stay out here.”  
“Okay.”

Catra heard the routine of the spell repeated, the same pattern as all the other times. Catra became lost in her thoughts for a few moments, wondering if this could truly be the day her wishes came true, and panicked because she wasn’t paying attention. She rushed in, hoping she hadn't missed Adora waking up. As she entered the room she saw Micah and Glimmer casting a faint spell. The spell grew bright as Catra came closer.

Everyone stared at Catra, mouths open. There was a silence where understanding seemed to pass between everyone but Catra.   
“The place most important to Adora isn’t a place, it’s a person. It’s Catra.” Entrapta said in awe.   
Those words sank in for Catra. It meant the world to her that she was the most important place to Catra. But just like every good memory, every reminder of her grand love for Adora, it was tinged with the sadness of not having her near. “What does that mean exactly?” Catra asked.   
“We need you for the spell, you can help Adora.” Said Glimmer.  
“I… of course.”  
“The connection will be strongest if you take her hand.” Entrapta stated.   
Even though she knew it would hurt, Catra wanted to do anything she could to help Adora. She slowly took Adora’s hand. It stung, the comfort she felt holding Adora’s hand. Adora’s hand had always fit so perfectly in Catra’s, and Catra had to remind herself it wasn’t real, at least not yet. 

The spell casting began. Glimmer and Micah each took one of the berries and put it in their left hand. With their right hand they began to draw the intricate and beautiful patterns of magic. The twin spells glowed a bright pink, and Adora gave Catra one last look before she closed her eyes and sat back in the chair. 

As the spells glowed brighter and brighter, Adora started to levitate an inch off her chair, and began to shine the same color as the spells. A silhouette much bigger than Adora, a silhouette of She-ra appeared around Adora.   
“Interesting.” Catra heard Entrapta say, and when she looked over she saw Entrapta taking notes. Adora began to sink down back into her chair, and the brightness of her and the spells slowly diminished. Adora sat there, slowly breathing with her eyes closed. Catra watched as again her dream, her greatest wish was about to come true. 

Adora slowly opened her eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait, a bit longer chapter though. Thanks for reading! :)


	24. Catra

Catra was so tired.

She was tired of not being with Adora, tired of carrying a pain with her no matter what she did or where she went. She wanted her life back, her life with Adora, the only time in Catra’s life that she was actually happy. When she saw the beauty in her life through love, spent time with her friends, her family, and knew she was home. Catra was beginning to wonder if that was just one long, perfect dream. An elaborate fantasy played out in the mind of someone who had just been through too much to bear. 

Maybe it was too good to be true. Maybe Catra didn’t deserve it. Maybe the universe sought to squash any happiness she had. Whatever the reason, Catra felt, no she knew joy was a fluke in her life, a rare, and precious and beautiful occurrence that she may never know again.

When Adora opened her eyes, those same thoughts ran through Catra’s head. She looked, and the eyes she saw were the eyes Catra had thought about for months, had missed just glancing at, the eyes of the person Catra loved more than anything or anyone else.

But it couldn’t be, no way was Catra that lucky, when had she ever been lucky before? This was just another cruel dream playing to her emotions, baiting her.

Something deep down inside of her had broken, and she wasn’t sure if she could fix it.

She watched as Glimmer, Bow and Entrapta immediately rushed to give Adora a hug. Micah and Castaspella left to check in later, looking like they had tears in their eyes. Catra had seen a scene like this play out too many times in her head. This was just another daydream, another impossible wish.

After a moment, everyone seemed to notice Catra was just standing there, staring at the group. They noticed her blinking away tears, and with furrowed eyebrows, shaking her head slowly and not letting herself, under any circumstance, believe.  
“Catra-“ Adora choked through her sobs. “Catra it’s me. I’m here.”  
Entrapta, Bow and Glimmer pulled away from the hug and backed away. “Catra, what’s wrong?” “It’s her, she’s really back!” No, Catra wanted to scream at her head to stop, she didn’t want to go through this another time, didn’t think she could go through this another time.

She sat down in a chair, still shaking her head, and doing a very poor job of fighting away tears. Bow said something about giving them some time alone, and Entrapta, Bow and Glimmer walked out of the room.

Adora tried to stand up and walk to Catra, but was extremely wobbly, and would’ve fallen over if Catra hadn’t rushed over to catch her and steady her. Adora grabbed onto Catra’s arm, and sat back down. They were remarkably close, closer than they had been in months. Adora took Catra’s hand.

It was her hand, her touch that made Catra realize this was no dream. Her eyes opened wide.

“Adora?” She asked with an almost childlike wonder. Adora nodded her head.

There was silence for a few moments as Catra sat down next to Adora, and brushed her hair out of her face and behind her ear tentatively, still cautious. Catra had grown used to quiet in the past months, a quiet that she hated, a quiet that she didn’t want. A silence that constantly surrounded her, one she couldn’t escape no matter what she did. 

This quiet was different. This silence wasn’t something to escape from, but something shared between her and Adora, something beautiful and peaceful. Catra put her hands gently on Adora’s shoulders. She moved her arms and wrapped them around Adora’s neck and the two met each other with an embrace Catra had long desired. Catra’s attempt to hold back tears fell apart, and she began to weep.  
“Adora… I’m sorry…” Catra could barely stop crying long enough to say those words, but Adora just held her closer and silenced her with a kiss. At that moment, it was like nothing else existed, just Catra and Adora. They were together again and nothing in the entire universe would pull them apart, neither Catra or Adora would let them. All of Catra’s doubts about the reality of this moment washed away, because she knew even a dream couldn’t create a moment so perfect.

It had been such a long time since Catra had felt this elated, had felt the warmth of love, of her love. After a kiss that took Catra’s breath away, they pulled away from each other slightly, and Catra stared at Adora, almost dumbfounded. Although she quite fittingly looked like she had just woken up from a very long rest, and looked a little bit pale, she was beautiful as always.

Catra blurted out what came directly from her heart. “Wow, you’re really here.” Adora smiled and laughed gently. Catra again decided to let her heart take the reins, and choked out the words, “I missed you so much Adora, so much” between her cries.  
“I know Catra, trust me I know.”  
Catra paused for a moment, taking the scene in, because this time it was for real.

….

“So, you really remember everything?” Catra asked.  
“Yes, I do.”  
“do you… remember when we disobeyed Shadow Weaver that one night? We went out in the rain just to feel what it was like.”  
“I also remember how much you hated getting wet.” Adora laughed softly, the laugh Catra missed so much.  
“Do you remember when we went to that clothing merchant in Thaymor, and we had a little fashion show?”  
“Yeah of course, the merchant kicked us out because our ‘little fashion show’ lasted hours.”  
They both giggled.  
“Do you remember that one time I faked twisting my ankle really bad so you would carry me?”  
“You faked that!?”  
Adora punched Catra, but it didn’t hurt at all.

Catra and Adora watched as the sun peeked out on the horizon and began to shine its rays on them. Catra leaned her head on Adora’s shoulder, and realized after a long journey she had finally reached her home. She had found rest in the comfort of love, and of Adora. It was quiet, and that was okay.

Catra will always remember that day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the last chapter of the main story, the last chapter will kind of be a bit disconnected. I’m also planning on the last chapter being around twice the usual length and it might take me longer than a week to write. So with that, I would like to thank all the people who have left Kudos, all the people who have bookmarked my little story, and all the people who have commented! Thank you so much!  
> 


	25. Epilogue Part One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this took me a lot longer than i thought it would lol, but here it is, the epilogue, at least partially. i decided to break it up into two parts, the second im optimistically aiming to post on the 19th of January, which i think is Adora’s birthday. i’ve been focusing a lot on editing past chapters too, which i will continue to do. thanks so much for reading, commenting, and bookmarking!!

Bow:

Bow sat on the bed, cradling his baby through the night hours. He had been up pretty much all night; tonight was his night to take care of her, he and Glimmer switched off. It had been about two months since she had been born, and they loved her to death. 

He had already changed her diaper and fed her, and so he was now desperately rocking her in his arms, trying to get her to rest so he could get at least one hour of sleep. After who knows how long of crying, his daughter finally quieted down, and eventually her cries quieted to silence. Bow checked, and she was finally asleep. As he got up as quietly and slowly as he possibly could to put her back in her crib, he saw the sun peek out over the whispering woods, starting to paint the sky with tones of orange and yellow. He sighed, then sat back down in his bed next to his wife. Before he knew it, he was asleep.

His sleep however, did not last long, for he was awoken by Catra.  
“Bow! Psst, wake up!” She whispered.  
“Huh? Catra? What on Etheria are you doing up so early?”  
Despite the early hours, Catra looked to be wide awake. Bow sensed a nervous energy coming from her, a departure from her normally cool and calm personality.  
“I just needed someone to talk to about something…”  
Bow glanced at Glimmer, but saw she was fast asleep, most likely exhausted from taking care of the baby the night before. Bow sat up in his bed.  
“Ok, sure, what do you want to talk about?”  
Even though he didn’t have a drop of energy left, he would always be there for his friend.  
“So… how do you… ask to form a legal union with someone?”  
Bow stared blankly into space for a moment, confused by the question.  
“In a romantic way.” Catra added.  
“Wait do you mean marriage?”  
“Um.. yeah.” Catra stated meekly.  
“Really?! I’m so excited for you!” Bow stood up and grabbed Catra with a hug. Catra gratefully returned the hug, and didn’t shy away from the friendly touch. Glimmer rolled over and said something unintelligible in her sleep.  
“Maybe we should talk about this somewhere else.” Bow said. Bow watched Catra smile, an occurrence that all those years ago was so rare.

“So do you have any ideas for the proposal?”  
“Well, not really, although I think I would like to propose at the autumn bloom festival. Is that a good idea?” Bow looked at Catra, so obviously nervous, just to talk about proposing to Adora with him. If there was one thing Adora was exceptionally talented at, it was making Catra nervous.  
“Yeah, I think that would be a great idea!” Bow said.  
And I was thinking I’d give her a really beautiful bracelet I found, and I’d propose right when they release the lanterns… Adora has always loved the festival, and I just thought it would be the right time and place.”  
“That would be so romantic.”  
“You don’t think it’s too much? Or do you think there would be too many people? I feel like there would be too many people. What if Adora doesn’t like it?” Catra looked at Bow, and he saw her anxiety.  
“I don’t know. I’ve been thinking about this for a long time, I always get so nervous, and I don’t really know why. Catra said looking down at her feet.  
“Catra, I know that you love Adora, and Adora loves you, and as long as whatever you do comes from your heart, she will adore it. I honestly don’t think you need to go to me for ideas, I know that no matter how you want to propose, it will be wonderful and romantic.”  
Catra seemed to mull that over in her head for a minute before she said,  
“Okay. Thank you so much.”  
“Let me know if you want to talk about anything else.” Bow told her.  
Catra gave Bow another tight hug, and walked back across the hall into her room, presumably to go back to bed for a couple hours. Bow smiled, and returned to lay back down next to Glimmer. Although he knew he would probably barely function tomorrow with the very small amount of sleep, he couldn’t help but be thankful for his family. He quickly stopped fighting the fog of tiredness hanging over him, and drifted off to sleep.

Catra:

It was weeks before the festival, and Catra was already having nightmares. 

She hated the nightmares. They had been a problem to her her entire life. In her childhood, she was often forced to relive bad experiences with Shadow Weaver. During the war, her nightmares were the most life-like. Not much had to be exaggerated from her day to fuel a nightmare. When Adora was in a coma, her sleep was haunted by Adora’s death. In her dreams Adora died hundreds of times, and every single time there was nothing Catra could do but watch Adora stop breathing.

Now, the many nightmares came in the form of Adora rejecting her at her weakest moment, at the time she would truly wear her heart on her sleeve. Catra quickly reminded herself that emotion isn’t weakness, and realized that after all these years, Shadow Weaver was still in her head. She knew it didn’t make sense for Adora to reject her. She knew it was a stupid fear. But the fear wouldn’t go away. 

The anxiety followed her like a shadow. She didn’t understand why she was so scared, why she wasn’t more mature, why she wasn’t stronger than her fears. 

To avoid the bad dreams, Catra liked to stay awake and sit on the balcony connected to her room. Tonight she sat in a chair outside, looked up at the stars, and searched them for her favorite constellations, and for some distraction. The wind blew over Bright Moon, made the leaves sway in the woods, and chilled Catra, but she ignored it. Catra rested her eyes on the deep and dark blue night, as the shadows of everything from trees to buildings controlled the landscape. It was beautiful, all of it, especially compared to the polluted, jagged mix of grey buildings in the Horde. 

She was startled by Adora’s gentle voice as she asked, “Catra? Is something wrong?” Catra turned her head.  
“Oh. hey Adora. No nothing’s wrong, I just couldn’t sleep.”  
“Well usually when you can’t sleep something’s wrong.” Adora took a breath, and Catra saw she looked concerned.  
“Do you… want to talk about anything?”  
She really wanted support from Adora, her closest confidant, the one who had gotten her through many hard times, but she knew she couldn’t, so she just responded with a shake of her head no. Adora walked over and sat next to Catra, and leaned her head on Catra’s shoulder.  
“It’s really cold, but if you can’t sleep I guess it’s my job as your girlfriend to be out here too.” She said, rolling her eyes. Catra smiled and kissed Adora on the cheek.  
“Wow, you must like me a lot to want to sit out here, in the cold, with the wind blowing, without even a blanket.”  
Adora stepped on Catra’s foot.

...

She was rapidly awoken from her dreams to the weightless feeling of teleporting with Glimmer.  
“Ah!” Catra exclaimed. “I told you never to teleport me without me knowing!”  
“Yeah yeah sorry, but Adora is eating breakfast so we only had a little while to show you this place. Surprise!” Glimmer exclaimed.  
Catra, who had only been awake for half a minute, and was just starting to shrug off the fogginess of sleep, took time to get her bearings and look around. They were on a small balcony overlooking a large court right outside the castle, and had a beautiful view of the river and the whispering woods. Bow and Glimmer both looked at her excitedly.  
“Where are we?  
“We’re on an old balcony, Bow and I remembered that we used to come here when we were younger, but it had fallen into disrepair later. It overlooks the court where the festival takes place.”  
“We realized it was the perfect spot... for you, so, we fixed it up.”  
Catra looked at her friends, no at her family.  
“You guys did this for me?” Catra smiled and pulled them in for a hug.  
“Thank you so much. This means so much to me.”  
“Of course Catra.”  
“I love you guys so much.” Catra said, still nestled between Bow and Glimmer.  
“We love you too Catra.”


End file.
